Secret And Lies

I just steps my feet on the ground when the shocking messages came into my cell
Finally, reality came and hit right on my face
Drag me out and forced me to realized and wake up from my beautiful dream
They did as if I’m dreadful criminal

I thought they never understand how much I love that place
Place I called home for years
Now they just asked me to pack up and leave
Just because I’m out of sight for a months?
I know they need space for new and available one vacant space
There’re, my space
I have my own not to tell them the reasons why I’m away
I just want my privacy
I’m oceans away right now, how could I home and packing up my stuff?
Then I just wondering, what they’ll do with it
Burn them in the dead of night as if they were evidence of some terrible crime?

Do they know who really I’m?
Do they care with what I want the most?
Do they care with what I feel?
Do they care with what I upset about?
They don’t
And I bet they even never bother with it
All they want just the boxes

I’ll not going to try to search who’s wrong or right
‘Cause I know for sure, everyone will claim to be the right one

Regretted, it happened just two days after my big triumphant
The joy just felt fade away with that wake up called
Really it was
I have to bow my head low
Tearing my eyes
Close my mind to try to reduce the pain

Secret and lies
The way I life and the way I survive for a long time
As they know, I’m the girl who always smiling around
Life in the perfect life
Have everything I supposed to have
As if I am the one who never ever cry, upset, harm
But I just an ordinary person
There’re moment I wanna cry
There’re moment I wanna say the truth
But to who I have to say who really I’m?
To the them who laid their best and big hope upon my shoulders?
To the one who wanted to see my failure?
To them who used to with my laughter?
I life in the beautiful dream world inside the cruel world
The one who always swallow all the bitterness by herself
That is me

The moment I have to stay steady and help him to keep up our momentum,
Maintain our pace
That such a f*cking sh*t came and trouble me
His smile, his gaze , his hold that used to cheer me up
Help nothing for me this time
I just stared the distance I even couldn’t catch
Unbelievable, while my biggest dream just inches away
I forced to let it goes away from my hands

Life really doesn’t goes on our ways
The phrase I keep telling myself dozen times in this last 24 hours
Pretty good trouble in the middle of the week


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